Posted by: mw23 | August 10, 2009

Would you like everything with that?

Today, my worst fear came true: I forgot to make a lunch in the morning.

Wow blog explosion!

I needed to share this because I had a very Peruvian experience just now at lunch. I left to eat Chifa today at a place Mark took me which I give 3 out of 5 stars to. It ranks at the top of the local Chifa joints.

I sat down and ordered a Limonada Helada. After the waiter confirmed with me about 4 times that I said Limonada Helada… I was able to peruse the menu. A key challenge in a Chifa restaurant is to make the correct guess as to what you’re ordering. Most of the menu items are listed in spanishs-ised chinese dish names. I decided to not gamble today… I learned not long ago gambling in Perú, sucks.

I asked the waiter, “¿Que plato tiene pollo con verduras?”. He may or may not have looked at me like I had two heads and was breathing fire from my nose… He had to ask his manager to help me.  I repeated the question. The manager said oh, ‘this one’ has chicken and vegetables in it. He pointed to option #1. I ordered it.

My frozen lemonade came and the waiter decided to get fancy while pouring the drink into my cup. He lifted the jug higher and higher away from the table until he jittered and spilled both in front of and behind the cup. I laughed, how could I not!

I sat and contemplated life a bit, and drank the lemonade, which seemed to have about a full cup of sugar in it. My meal finally arrived, complete with the usual, salty chicken egg-fried rice in one bowl and the entrée. Now when my eyes gazed on this special sight… I wasn’t sure where the chicken was but there sure was a mound of something sitting in-front of me, including every single other type of edible meat on the planet.

Let me describe this dish for you: It was complete with beef, pork, shrimp, seaweed, kelp, little hard boiled bird eggs, mystery bad tasting mushrooms, normal mushrooms, bok choy, onions, superabundantly salty sauce and yes finally I discovered the fried skinned chicken underneath the pile of other meats.

Yes, everything mentioned above was legitimately was on that plate. And yes I said bird eggs. They are small… and come not from a chicken. I might even venture to say it’s entirely possible that guinea pig also made it into this foray of protein inspired culinary excellence.

It was not appetizing, in fact I hated it. The ridiculously sugary lemonade sucked and so did the salty protein aftertaste that I had in my mouth as I walked back to work.

But the moral to the story is, life is really way too hilarious to be having these experiences alone! I wish someone else could have seen all this with me… hah!

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Responses

  1. I loved the waiter’s attempt to impress you by pouring your lemonade. Did he scowl at you when you laughed at his spillage?

  2. Well….I guess you couldn’t send it back, eh?

  3. ya hueverto come nomas que ya estas viejo pa cojudeces 🙂


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